Nobody knows, it's a accumulation of emotion. And I started to longed for hugs, and shoulder to lean on. But I can't, I know negative emotion chase all friends away, I know. I rather to swallow all of that emotion down my throat, and kill them with pills.

There're too much things happen in the past week, and I tried to put them aside, dump them behind. But some of the brocken pieces of the memories eventually stays, and fucked up my brain and emotion control ability. And anytime, someone could just press the button unintentionally, and trigger the bomb. It exploded once silently, when I just stepped in to the class today. And I shall not let it explode again.

Therefore, I dig a hole, and hide it deep, hoping noone sees it. I need a good cry, and I will be fine.